Corrections (pgs 1-95)

[aussiejim]

BTW this will bore most people who choose to read this topic, except for the Editors. ;)

Ahh, when I read this document I keep on wanting to change it to English grammar and spelling, rather than American grammar and spelling. Not trying to go too off the topic, but American English is better in one way to English: it's more phonetic (what you say is how you write it).

Onto the corrections:

7.2.5.2 (Pg 7 Col 2 Para 5 Line 2) Rogue -> Rogues
7.2.7.2 realizing goal -> realizing his goal
8.1.5.7 olds -> old
11.1.5.1 peoples -> people
11.2.1.2 some a slight -> some slight
20.1.5.5 patron in involved -> patron is involved
20.1.6.4 and livelihood -> and a livelihood
20.1.6.6 develops -> develop
20.2.5+ Need to ‘tab/indent’ Skill Points at Each Additional Level
22.1.4.8 politics if famous -> politics is famous
23.1.4.2 feat in addition any -> feat in addition to any
24.1.9.1 Gather Information can provide a -> Gather Information provide a +2
25.1.4+ Need to ‘tab/indent’ Retry: …
26.1.Battlecaster Need to ‘tab/indent’ Prerequisites: …
27.1.4.1 You receive -> Target receives
28.1.15.9 requires the priestess to a craft(tattoo) against DC 19. -> a successful craft (tattoo) check against DC 19 by the priestess.
30.1.3.5 then those -> than those
33.1.4.5 minor , -> minor,
33.2.4.3 Need to fully italicize Ruling a domain
34.2.1.5 are have -> have
35.1.4.2 the both -> both
35.1.4.6 existent -> in existence
35.2.2.3 + -> + the
35.2.4.4 to strength -> to the strength
36.1.5.2 2.3 -> 2.2
38.1.6.4 closest a score -> closest has a score
38.1.6.10 less 40 -> less than 40
38.2.1.2 very power -> very powerful
38.2.2.4 then he -> he then
38.2.3.5 again -> gain
38.2.3.11 Need to correct the doubled over writing
39.1.4.3 Blood abilities may -> Blood abilities
43.1.2.2 temporarily gain -> temporary gain in
43.1.7.11 change is. -> change.
45.1.1.1 must make a must make a -> must make a
45.2.6.1 Scions if -> Scions of
46.2.9.8 damage in -> damage is
47.2.8.2 All except Vorynn -> Anduiras, Azrai, Brenna, Reynir.
49.1.13.6 appears an -> appears as an
51.1.1.1 based in -> based on
52.2.5.4 sources in the -> sources in
54.1.2.3 alternations -> alterations
54.1.5.2 to their suit -> to suit
54.1.6.8 respect to influence -> respect and influence
54.2.2.2 dabble in death magics -> dabbles in death magic
55.1.5.4 alternation -> alteration
55.2.5.8 wizard and non-wizard -> wizards and non-wizards
56.1.3.7 a self-fulfilling -> self-fulfilling
56.2.2.11 under takes -> undertakes
57.2.2.5 Regency point are spent -> Regency points spent
57.2.3.6 for this deity -> for the deity
58.2.1.2 is increases -> increases
59.1.1.1 This effect occurs -> This effect
59.2.Magician Spells.2.2 bard special -> bard’s special
59.2.Magician Spells.2.5 should at -> at
59.2.Magician Spells.2.5 spell on -> spell is on
59.2.Magician Spells.3.1 includes considers -> includes
61.2.6th level? Need to add: Suppress Bloodline
67.1.Suppress Bloodline Level: Mag 1 -> Level: Mag 6 (not too sure what level it is supposed to be)
68.1.1.1 Cerilian -> Cerilia
68.2.4.5 immediately -> immediate
68.2.6.5 may very from -> may vary from
69.1.2.1 wishes their -> wishes of their
69.1.2.2 When time -> When the time
71.2.4.6 written as it -> written as if it
72.2.3.2 conjectural -> conjectural
72.2.4.6 but it always -> but it is always
72.2.4.7 direct them towards safely -> direct them safely
74.1.4.4 Delete Paladins of Cuiraecen are Chaotic Good and may multiclass freely as Fighters. As it appears at 74.2.1.7
74.2.2.3 Success is battle -> Success in battle
74.2.5.13 also can also -> can also
75.1.6.6 changed in several -> changed several
76.1.1.1 in it the cities -> in the cities,
76.2.1.1 reminded of that -> reminded that
76.2.1.3 the lost of -> the loss of
77.1.5.12 he be counted -> to be counted
77.2.3.2 fasting -> of fasting
77.2.4.1 The ties and -> The ties of
78.1.2.1 allow -> allows
78.2.6.7 for cannot -> for he cannot
78.2.7.3 him be -> him to be
79.1.1.5 and he -> and she
79.1.1.16 pawn her -> pawn of her
79.2.4.3 worth -> worthy
80.1.5.2 in efforts -> in your efforts
80.2.4.9 great danger is -> great danger in
82.2.2.3 capture -> captured
83.1.6.4 dwarf of -> dwarf
83.2.5.1 Refuges -> Refugees
83.2.7.3 reachable -> reached
84.1.6.8 and it almost -> and is almost
84.2.1.3 elects -> elect
84.2.5.2 be true -> be the true
85.Table 4-11 Need to put a carriage return after Administrate,
85.2.5.2 Azrai’s spirit -> Azrai’s corrupt spirit
85.2.5.3 a corrupt sheen -> a sheen
85.2.6.3 is has -> has
85.2.7.2 clothes too often washed and too long left in the sun -> clothes washed too often and left too long in the sun
86.1.1.3 return -> returning
86.1.4.12 seats of powers -> seats of power
86.2.3.9 the imagining -> imagining
86.2.5.2 Question? is similar to Sera’s Marketplace Eternal yet is before Sera’s Marketplace Eternal description.
86.2.5.5 indulge all -> indulge in all
86.2.6.2 except Cerilia -> except
87.1.3.2 all books, song, and art -> all the books, songs, and artworks
87.1.5.3 spike carved -> spike is carved
87.1.6.5 forms they -> forms that
87.1.7.2 of miles -> for miles
87.1.7.10 live again -> lives again
88.1.1.4 An ancient -> Or an ancient
88.1.3.2 share some -> share certain
88.1.3.6 domain decision -> domain decisions
88.2.1.7 levels then the numbers -> levels greater than the number
89.1.1.1 that most -> that
90.1.5.4 structure -> structures
90.1.5.5 the trade -> trade
90.1.5.18 manufacture -> manufactured
90.2.1.2 travel or -> to travel over
91.1.2.2 represents -> represent
91.1.5.2 in order -> in order to
92.1.1.1 and network -> and a network
92.1.3.4 oversea -> overseas
92.1.5.7 traderoute -> trade route
92.1.6.1 traderoute -> trade route
92.2.1.5 in has -> has
93.1.3.2 regent dislike -> regent as dislike
93.1.3.3 or another -> or the other
93.2.2.8 ruler ship -> rulership
93.2.5.6 + 1 for two members +1 for four members -> +2 for four members
94.1.5.6 the both -> then both
94.2.1.12 of previous -> of the previous
94.Table 5-8.2.10 epic dead -> epic deed
94.Table 5-8.3.14 except the defense -> except for the defense
95.1.4.1 diplomatic finance -> diplomatic, finance
95.1.4.4 have at one -> have at least one
95.2.5.9 80% -> 60%


Here's a list of changes as either they're not explained well enough or there seems to be a mistake, and I'm none the wiser of exactly what you wanted to say.

24.1.10.4 Question? What game mechanic makes Knowledge (appropriate region) and Knowledge (Nobility and royalty) particularly useful?
24.2.5.1 Question? What is the game mechanic for Lead can also be used to help train military units?
26.1.Battlecaster/Prerequisites Question? Spellcaster, level 5th+ -> Spellcaster level 5+ ?
35 Question? Where are the Bloodline templates?
41.Blood Abilities Game Rule change – Would it not be more appropriate for Blood Abilities to be based upon Effective Character Level, rather than Character Level. A scion with a Great Template should have their abilities operate longer than one with a Minor Template.
42.Battlewise Question? Shouldn’t Battlewise include the following sentence at the end of the description Warcraft is considered a class skill for the character.
50.Wither Touch Question? victim must make a Fortitude save versus what?
59.Spell Domain Question? Is the +2 bonus a Skill Focus feat bonus or separate too?
91.1.2.5 Question? Shouldn’t less than twice -> up to twice (denotes <= 2x, rather than <2x, i.e. a Level 1 Shipyard should be able to build a Coaster, Dhow and Keelboat, not just a Kellboat)


Now onto the next 90 pages.

P.S. Loved the refreshing way Chapter 4: Gods and Religion was written.

[Birthright-L]

From: "aussiejim" <brnetboard@TUARHIEVEL.ORG>


> Ahh, when I read this document I keep on wanting to change it
> to English grammar and spelling, rather than American grammar
> and spelling.

I think we should pick one language (US vs. UK English) and stick to it.
Someone with a good feel for language should have final editing rights and
see to it that language is consistent.

Since this is a US game, I think we should go with US language, but that is
just an opinion.

/Carl




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[aussiejim]

In a different thread, one of the editors has already commented that the document would be written in US English. The corrections I have posted are all in US English (despite my twitchy fingers ;) ).

([_]

[Raesene Andu]

Yes, it was decided to go with the US spelling of words as almost all D&D products printed in English use the US spelling or words, no matter how wrong they might be. Of course, it could be worse, we could all be using the US pronunciations as well...

Thanks for the corrections Aussiejim, much appreciated by all of us.

[Ariadne]

Please look trough your domain descriptions (ca. p. 58). There are some mistakes within the names.

Example:
Sea domain, but ocean domain spells (Greatings from FR ;) )
Flame domain, but fire domain spells
Night domain, but shadow domain spells (if I remember right)

as I remember there are some more (I don't excess them in the moment), simply look please...

[Ariadne]

Oh, the description about Vos: There is no written language you wanted to say. Right?

[irdeggman]

Originally posted by aussiejim

Here's a list of changes as either they're not explained well enough or there seems to be a mistake, and I'm none the wiser of exactly what you wanted to say.
26.1.Battlecaster/Prerequisites Question? Spellcaster, level 5th+ -> Spellcaster level 5+ ?
This is because it requires at least a 3rd level spell to provide any benefits on the battlefiled (se Chap 6, pg 129) and the lowest level spellcaster that can cast a 3rd level spell is a 5th level wizard/cleric/druid.

35 Question? Where are the Bloodline templates?
Chap 2, pg 35 within the paragraph see under the entries for hit points, bloodabilities, level adjustment. While not listed in tabular form (it was done this way for space considerations in an attempt to reduce the number of pages and yet still maintain the ease of use - this reasoning may have to be revisited if more people are having difficulty understanding the templates and what they entail)

41.Blood Abilities Game Rule change – Would it not be more appropriate for Blood Abilities to be based upon Effective Character Level, rather than Character Level. A scion with a Great Template should have their abilities operate longer than one with a Minor Template.

The template will increase the blood score which will increase the blood ability modifier (each template yields at least a +1 increase in the modifier) which increases the DC of the appropriate ability's DC saving throw. A minor ability is always a minor ability and there was no disctintion in 2nd between a great score scion having a minor ability and a minor score scion with the same ability, at least under the proposed system the saving throws are more difficult.

ECLs don't affect other level based benefits such as BAB or saving throw bonuses - it just didn't seem wise to muck up an existing system with some more specialized applications.

42.Battlewise Question? Shouldn’t Battlewise include the following sentence at the end of the description Warcraft is considered a class skill for the character.

Not a class skill, but perhaps a bonus to skill checks would be appropriate. What do other people think on this one?

50.Wither Touch Question? victim must make a Fortitude save versus what?

See pg 40-41 for the description for how to determine the appropriate saving throw DC. It was felt that putting all the information in one place instead of under each individual blood ability description would make it more uniform, less confusing and of course save space. One mechanic for all saving throws.

59.Spell Domain Question? Is the +2 bonus a Skill Focus feat bonus or separate too?

It is a bonus not an application of the Skill Focus feat, hence they should stack. And it should be a +2 to both skills listed.

[Ariadne]

Skills:

Speak Language: You have forgot to integrate "Masetian" into the ancient language list...

[Raesene Andu]

I believe that Masetian would be more correctly classified as a dead language.

The other ancient languages (Andu, High Brecht, etc) may still be spoken by a few people, but the Masetians died out, their language and culture has been lost or absorbed, and there is no one left to speak their tongue, thus their language is not on the list.

[Birthright-L]

I don`t believe Masetian to be so completely died out. Remnants exist on the
Isle of the Serpent - the Serpent himself has Masetian as a native language.
And it`d be encountered all the time on inscriptions in Masetian ruins. Even
if no degenerate Masetian culture exists in some marsh somewhere (which it
probably does - this is still fantasy), I bet all those scholars in Khinansi
lands who study the Maetians have deciphered their language. After all,
Comprehend Languages makes for a great Rosetta stone (even if I admit it
mitigates the need for a deciphering).

/Carl


----- Original Message -----
From: "Raesene Andu" <brnetboard@TUARHIEVEL.ORG>
To: <BIRTHRIGHT-L@ORACLE.WIZARDS.COM>
Sent: Sunday, March 09, 2003 3:53 AM
Subject: Re: Corrections (pgs 1-95) [36#1399]


> This post was generated by the Birthright.net message forum.
> You can view the entire thread at:
http://www.birthright.net/read.php?TID=1399
>
> Raesene Andu wrote:
> I believe that Masetian would be more correctly classified as a dead
language.
>
> The other ancient languages (Andu, High Brecht, etc) may still be spoken
by a few people, but the Masetians died out, their language and culture has
been lost or absorbed, and there is no one left to speak their tongue, thus
their language is not on the list.
>
>
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